so this is the real you?
to be honest i was quite startled.
okay, i just din expect it.

but anyway, i joined in too.

changes are inevitable i guess
but im still the same old me, just that ive aged(haha)
be old enough to do things i want, but old enough to have self control.
i din do it out of fun, i just thought i needed it.








fuck you very much.

i typed out a whole chunk for the reason why im saying this.
but to think that she might see it, i got abit ham ji.haha!

but yeah.this bitch aka my bf's buddy(WTF?!), we were friends before?

fuck you for flirting with my bf.

-roll eyes.

and ya, its not like i dont trust him.
but i simply dont like and not comfortable with the idea of him going out with a girl/ girls only.

i mean yes i do go out with my guy frds also,
but i dont fucking flirt with them.
so its a completely different issue.

OMG.
today was really a fuck day.
i felt like my mind was going to split.

damn happy cause we finally get to see each other.and he was really sweet today
BUT
i just got so mad and sad over those issues.

yes ive talked to him abt it and he has explained.
and ya i was claimed to be 'thinking too much'
but aiyar do you just freaking understand what is meant by DONT LIKE.
dont like dont like dont like dont like!

):
HMPH


you knw i needed those words of assurance
you dont say them so i asked
i always do, perhaps a lil way too many times but i really needed those
i need to knw ure feeling the same way as i do

my emotions today are just like roller coaster going up and down and up and down again
sucks
one time im feeling really really happy and (: big time
then hours later the opposite
now im feeling the latter when just an hour ago i was grinning from ear to ear

but you know right?then why like that?

i hate to end calls like that.ARGH seriously

are you freaking feeling the same way?

wish i could just fuck these qns in my mind and go to sleep but i just cant!

hell yeah, loads of hell drillings and hammering are going to wake me up from my sleep tmr morning AGAIN.


weekends are over! ):

though the lack of sleep during the weekends, love them still (:

had been faithfully waking up at ard 8am.freaking 8am man!for tuitions.
just gotten this new assignment and really kinda regretting taking it now!
idk just hate waking up so early on a sat.
then to find out that she's a mgs girl, so high expectations from mum, so more stress induced on me.
aiyar just the word regret la!
the girl's english got slang one leh, then while explaining chemistry im made to slang~ along with her too haha!
but she's a smart and hardworking girl la (omg teaching a dumber one is a way easier job!) and the mum is friendly and nice.
now is just too late to regret already!all i have to do is to teach well!and hope i knw my stuff :p
gotta constantly remind myself of the extra income to keep me going!

then yay i finally gotta see ter after 5days!
5 days to me is like hell already okay.
and ive never laughed so much in this few weeks already! (:
happy girl today!
and we caught mr popper's penguins!super cute movie!i give it a 5 star lor! (:

watched so many matches of wnc too!
the final match was really breath-taking!
omg i couldnt sit still and watch, its just pure exciting cos its really a tough match between aus and nzl!
shooters responsibility is really mad huge man!it really determines how the game goes ya!
no matter how hard the defenders are creating the turn overs to us, and how hard the mid fielders are bringing down the ball to us, if the shooters cant convert the shots in, its just pure wasted efforts.
im really not much of a pressure taker.
in a tough match like that i bet i will just freak out and die.
saw how the GS missed such a near shot at the last freaking 2sec (or so?), i could totally understand man!i feel you yo!
really admire that strong desire to win the game.like how the aussies made a comeback after losing 7 goals at the 2nd quarter.then to a draw at the end of the game.and finally won by 1 goal after extra time!
aiyar miss playing netball so much after watching so many matches!

on sat when ter was sending me home
me: why you driving so slow?
ter: cos i like you hugging me like that.
:D :))) x infinity

ANYWAYS.
i broke my fucking nail and my index finger is fucking hideous!
part of the nail just detached from the flesh.
the pain was manageable..until it touches water.hell loads of pain!
it isnt painful anymore but just really ugly!
eeyer wanted to do my nails this week one.

yay cant wait for thurs!


love it!
its cheap and affordable and smells damn nice too!

damn!why my birthday pass already if not its definitely on my wish list!haha!

i still have 2 more!
gna stock up more of these masks!My Beauty Diary Mask!


i cant believe ive to go thru that 'omg my bf is in camp' period again!
the only and last time of that was when ter just enlisted to army in tekong.and that period only lasted a couple of months cause he went for ops.
then aft that he got posted to a stay out unit which is damn slacky!
so i was one of those lucky gfs ard who get to see their army bf quite often!

but now!idk he's so suay to kana ICT less than a year after he ORD.
furthermore, he's just a clerk man.stay in for fuck!

so what he does now is..NOTHING.cause there are apparently 10 plus clerks there,who has nothing to do as well.how lame is that.
so is this how our saf use their valuable resources?
throw them in their bunks and let them rot their 2 weeks away?

my bf is suppose to rot with me since im having holidays!not rot with you all man damn it.

and his only hope of deferment:FOC is dashed!
okay part of me is quite glad la ( i knw im mean! hehe)
but aiyoh dunno leh.

so if i had a choice, him going ICT or FOC.

...


...

ICT.

HAHAHHAA

okay not that im what la.im just not comfortable and i dont like the fact that there are bound to be alot, and i mean alot of physical contact with the opposite sex.
not that i dont trust him, not that i think too highly of my bf, not that im paranoid but just DONT LIKE.

okay if taking these two scenarios for comparison, if he goes for FOC, ah yes he will be nua-ing with me the whole of this week!but next week in FOC, i cant see him as well,minimal phone calls and msg.PLUS worry.

if he goes for ICT, two weeks of not seeing him except weekends.but endless sms and phone calls.NO WORRIES.

HAHA so why not right.
but i know he's super duper uber sian.
he's not gg to read this space but ya, im actually secretly happy abt it. :]

read xiaxue's blogpost abt trust dated 29th june.and i couldnt agree more with her!
http://xiaxue.blogspot.com/2011/06/trust.html